Chapter 2

They laughed at the ones who invented the wheel, learned to harnass fire, and first learned to play jazz.

There is nothing more stupid in life than life itself.

There is no pain without an audience.

By the end of the day, the earth is limping around the sun.

God uses lightning bolts; the devil, axe blows. Thus the devil clears more trees.

If AIDS did not exist, if would have to be invented.

If you hate whores for being whores, and cats for being cats, then the problem is with you.

The man who can give a wife a credit card and a mistress a diamond necklace is prosperous indeed, though not necessarily happy.

He who is happy should conceal his happiness like a poker player would conceal a good hand.

For most people, wedding pictures are a reminder that one has made a terrible mistake.

If you loan money to a friend and get it back, consider it a gift.

If you tell one person a secret, you have usually told the whole world.

Children are God's eyes, because they see everything.

Perhaps the hardest lesson in life is to learn that the parent becomes the child and the child becomes the parent.

Nearly all deaths are suicides.

All generalizations are dangerous, including this one.

There is nothing more ill-placed than trust.

Don't look behind that curtain! Or you may find that the god you worship is really a devil...

Yes, Jesus had to be crucified, because who could worship a god who died by lethal injection?

Women's liberation has nothing to with liberation, but everything to do with women.

To make peace, we often have to appeal to the baser part of our enemy's nature.

Before you can love God, you must first learn to stand up to him.

In the end, only work gives us lasting satisfaction. All other pleasures are fleeting.